segunda-feira, 3 de outubro de 2011

Two wor(l)ds.

"This is my last chance to make things right", she kept saying to herself after that 40 minutes talk with a total stranger. This stranger wasn't just a stranger. It happened to be that person she never thought she would met, cuz "who in hell would agree with those fuckeries created in my mind?" she kept in her mind for 17 years of a lifetime. But then, i must repeat, a total stranger out of nowhere happened to be this person, and she could realise it in 40 fucking minutes. Nothing else, nothing less.
As days passed by the stranger was no longer so stranger, or at least she thought it wasn't. She have always loved "too much and too soon", but this time it was like her personal record. With the blink of an eye that no-longer-so-stranger was a part of her life, and she couldn't handle a whole day without it. Talking about random stuffs has never been so nice, and so necessary, and luckily she wasn't the only one to agree with that. "Give me back the life you stole", he would say to her everyday when it was already too late for them to be talking, and no one was up to end it anyway, cuz they just couldn't. There was never been such an incredible connection before, and she felt it, THEY felt it, and for the first time in her life she was actually optimist about something. "It is him. It gotta be".
As she watches that friendship in her heart turn into something more, the so-called-the-one started to show the same.


Things has never been so right, and she was never so sure. "He's the first, and I've never been so sure about it." she found herself thinking, which actually scared her a bit, but she didn't care, cuz "He's too good to be truth", was also in her mind. As days kept passing by things were getting better and better, and what was only this awkward amount of friendship and desire has turned to passion. Passion? She wish! It was actually LOVE. That four letter word she hated more than anything.


Suddenly things wasn't going so right anymore, and what once seemed to be both-side, was now unilateral. "No. Not again. Not anymore." What was heaven turned to hell in a second. Just like many times before she has been forgotten, like if she never existed. No more talks, no more calls, no more messages, no more nothing, just this emptiness and silence that has been left.


Pain. Lots of it. "What the hell happened?", raped her mind every single second, and even in dreams she wasn't allowed to find some peace, cuz he was also there, and everywhere, and his smell, and his voice, and every second they shared. It was always there, haunting her, and she doesn't even knows what to do with so much rejected feelings right now. She also still doesn't know the reason behind it all, and probably never will, and she will never get it too, cuz someone who has been so hurt like he seems to be could never reject something so real and health. But like i said, she knows anything anymore. The only thing she knows is that this feeling is avoiding to say good bye as easily as he did.

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